The cabin was rustic. As camp cabins go. The walls lined with bunks on both sides. I was twelve years old. At sleep away camp. It was a cold rainy day and all activities had been cancelled. The counselors were nowhere to be seen.
So a bunch of us walked over to the girls cabin. I was the last of the boys to enter through the screen door. So Jordan you really like that Natasha girl don't you. I looked up to see a mousy face peering out at me from one of the many top bunks.
I began to flush and my heart race. Natasha...of course I liked Natasha. She was the only thing I thought about the whole school year between camp sessions. The previous summer I hung out with her constantly. She was much older then I and thought of me as a little brother.
I, on the other hand, was completely smitten. I basked in her attention the year before....but this year was different. She had little use for me now. She no longer sought my attention. She was busy with the older boys. I was forgotten.
I guess I was not very good at hiding my puppy dog eyes. But to be called out in public. Standing among my friends and all those girls! I looked around the room from face to expectant face. I vacillated internally....to tell the truth and gush my feelings so publicly....or to deny, make a joke, blow it off.
I smiled sheepishly and my eyes shot to the ground. Yes...yes I like her.
Silence. And then the crowd parted and standing behind the bunk beds hidden out of sight was Natasha. I looked up and caught her beautiful eyes...all I saw was embarrassment. She sputtered a lame excuse...I was just looking at a poster in the corner...
But I barely heard the rest. I turned and left quickly through the front door. The tears brimming in my eyes...set up, I was set up!
And after all these years...
the emotion returns...
still fresh in my chest like it was yesterday.
Long...long after the memory
of those eyes
have faded.
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