Relevance

Do I resonate?

Have you ever heard such self indulgent blather from a blogger?

There was a time when such a question was irrelevant.  I grew up feeling like I was spawned secretly from another planet.  My alien thoughts and perspectives not only did not jive with my cohorts, I felt like a mime debuting on a radio station.  I was different.  I was misunderstood.  I was speaking in a foreign tongue.

It's amazing how this internal separateness became a normal part of reality.  I could no more deny it than I could remove the scar above my eye from the stitches I received in first grade.  Being an anomaly, I learned rather quickly how to minimize my differences.  It became much easier to shake my head in mock agreement than to explain that to me the sky was white and the clouds were blue.

But something happens as one gets older.  Society's chains are no match for the chaffing, sputtering mind as it matures.  Ideas germinate and take root strangling ones innards as words come flying through fingertips and attach themselves to web pages.

At times those words stick and posts are showered with comments and repeated and retweated.  And there are those occasions when sentences lose their form and dance stubbornly in the eye of the reader till the blurr becomes meaningless static.

I still feel like the outsider.  Post after post appears on my blog, but the seat of comfort refuses to adjust to the fidelity of the echo that bounces back at me.

Do I resonate?

Even if I did,

would it matter?